Lapse of security shocks the art world

Mistress Heelena has made quite a few controversial public appearances lately, so it was hardly surprising that she hit the news headlines again following her recent trip to Paris. This time, it was the turn of the art-loving public to be scandalized as she brazenly exhibited herself as ‘live’ art with one of her, so called ‘foot slaves’ in the Musee du Louvre. Worse was to come though!

Visitors at the gallery were stunned as, all of a sudden, Mistress Heelena’s ‘foot slave’ began biting through her stockings and then proceeded to passionately suck and kiss her exposed toes. Earlier in the day, Mistress Heelena had walked coolly into the gallery and, without making prior arrangements, hung her recently commissioned portrait by ‘Sardax’ on the wall behind her, before taking a similar static pose with her co-conspirator.

Security staff at the gallery had not noticed the additional ‘exhibit’ until a rather large number of people started to build up on the second floor of the building. Local gendarmes were on the scene within minutes of being alerted but, mysteriously, Mistress Heelena had disappeared, leaving her ‘foot slave’ on his own to ‘paint a picture’ of events. He is still in police custody!

One visitor to the gallery explained, “Mon dieu! I couldn’t believe my eyes, I was admiring Mistress Heelena’s beautiful ‘contours’ when, suddenly, the ‘artwork’ began to get a little animated! Obviously, lying on the floor next to Mistress Heelena’s gorgeous feet for so long got too much for him. He was clearly engrossed and in a world of his own. She, on the other hand, was quite impassive and simply smiled enigmatically at the astonished crowd. She looked just like the Mona Lisa!”

A spokesman for the gallery was suitably red-faced and apologised, not only for the lapse in security, but also for the behaviour of this particular ‘exhibit’. “This is outrageous,” he said, “We expect all our visitors to behave decently. We certainly didn’t realise that Mistress Heelena was amongst the exhibits. Fortunately, I don’t think this publicity stunt has tarnished the gallery’s excellent international reputation – on the contrary, in fact!”

Mistress Heelena was customarily elusive after the incident and was unavailable for comment. A source close to her said, “Mistress Heelena craves excitement and abhors stereotype. She certainly likes to ‘live on the edge’ and try the patience of the authorities. As usual, she evaded the long arm of the law, but someone had to pay the price for her notoriety – he was just lucky, that on this occasion, he got away without having to pay the normal tribute for such a privilege!”

dpsS news agency